Roy Edroso

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Roy Edroso Breaks It Down

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July 15

I let this front page go nearly a month before updating. And I’m way too tired now to do a good job of it. But about 10, 15 years ago I entered a phase of honoring pledges after a lifetime of blowing them off. It hasn’t always been satisfying and in point of fact* it’s often extremely unsatisfying — commitments are a pain in the ass.

* just want to say “in point of fact” is one of my favorite superfluous expressions — that is, the sort of phrases that you barely need, and for which shorter statements like “actually” would do the job just as well (even better, when you take into account that many of your auditors won’t know what you’re talking about), but sometimes you use them just because the rhythm of the extra syllables is more poetic, or because they help you stall for time to think. For an acting class years ago I played Joey in a scene from Simon Gray’s Butley, and Joey’s habit of saying “in point of fact,” especially when on the defensive, was very much a key to the character. Also I once had a girlfriend who used the spoonerized phrase “the truth of the fact” in its place, which I still like.

But this is one of those moral decisions that you make without hope of reward. And I when I say that, I mean “without hope of the cheap rewards of money and prestige that this poor world has to offer, but with hope of something better than that to come.” And when I say “something better than that to come” I mean I hope I get some inkling of it in this world rather than having to wait for it in the next, or to hell with this morality shit.

That’s always the rub, eh? The moral choice is always something that pulls through very much late for the winner’s circle. The bet is that all the stuff you believed about what really mattered in life… really mattered. And if you lose, well, Pascal knew: No big loss.

Anyway my devotion gets you lucky people a cellphone shot of the Washington Mall, Fourth of July as folks gathered for the fireworks. More photos and words on that here.

See you soon!

Space space sp

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